At my junior high, high school entrance exams are finally out of the way, meaning classes are getting a little less textbook and a lot more practical. For the last few weeks, my students and I have been doing a question-and-answer exchange. For 10 minutes a day, they write down a few questions for me to correct and answer, and hopefully teach them something about conversation along the way. The result has been a creative, bizarre, adorable glimpse into junior high curiosities often lost in translation, but thankfully not quieted by the fear of making a mistake.
Q: What Samurai do you know?
A: Excellent question. Before I moved to this fascinating country, everything I knew about Japan I learned from Hollywood. In fact, some of my favourite films and television shows growing up were centered around Japanese culture: 3 Ninjas. 3 Ninjas Knuckle Up. 3 Ninjas Kick Back. Sailor Moon. Unfortunately, none of those touched on samurai, so I'm going to have to go with Nathan Algren, as depicted by Tom Cruise in the 2003 blockbuster, The Last Samurai. Epic film, if I remember rightly.
Q: Who is love phantom for you?A: The creativity of this one just blew me away. I don't even know how to answer. I tried approaching her in person for a bit of insight. This got me nowhere.
Q: Where are you going?
A: Right now? In life? I ask myself that question everyday.
Q: Lady Gaga is very beautiful and cool. How about you?
A: I am also very beautiful and cool. Thank you for asking.
Q: I like dog
A: Poor kid. Somehow her running out of ideas coincided with forgetting everything I've taught her about punctuation.
Q: How old do you want to marry?
A: I don't necessarily think about how I old want to get married - more like at what age will I no longer be okay with being a lonely old spinster who spends her spare time chasing cats in the parking lot and emailing pictures of them to her friends' digital picture frames despite being told to stop. I haven't narrowed down an exact number, but I'm not there yet, that's for sure.
This last one makes me laugh because of the order of the questions. He carefully planned each move, waiting for a green-light-answer before braving the next question.
- Do you like me? (Yes, you are a good student.)
- Do you have a boyfriend? (No.)
- How old do you want to marry? (Probably my late twenties or early thirties.)
- I want to marry in my late twenties, too!!!!
The uncharacteristic excitement he showed by the end of this is so cute, I just don't have the heart to tell him that by the time he's in his late twenties, I will be a 40 year old aforementioned psycho spinster, or remind him that I'm his teacher.
And of course, life is always exciting at the elementary schools. With varying levels of English/interpretations of my job description, Wednesdays and Fridays at the sho-gakko continue to get more bizzare. At my Wednesday school, I've been asked to teach the year 6 class "When You Wish Upon a Star." I agreed, partly because I knew I didn't have a choice, and partly because I thought I'd be lipsynching to a cd (wrong.)
One week, I'm a "guest speaker" in music class, giving a performance my kocho-sensei insists brought him to tears, the next week I'm blindly led into the multimedia room to give a concert with a microphone and a sound system. I always said that earning three quarters of my graduating credits in choir and vocal jazz would pay off one day, and here we are, world. 6 years later and I'm still reaping the benefits of my Mennonite education.
Thankfully, they did let me take a break from singing this week to do my signature holiday construction paper craft. Behold, Ms. Kuroee's Valentine's Day finger puppet. She'll look great next to my Jack-o-Lantern mask and Santa hat.
With all of the week's excitement, I enjoy a relaxing day at my Friday elementary school, where no one speaks English and everyone's too afraid to test my Japanese to ask me to do anything. This leaves me guessing a lot, but I'm never short on ideas for educational posters.
Happy Valentine's Day everyone.
As much as I try I'll never forget the extremely questionable and awkward version of 'Psycho Killer' performed by my best friend and I in front of a huge auditorium filled with Chinese children / teachers on an acoustic guitar and some bongos.
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